Yesterday I talked to a worship leader who told me he was planning on leaving his ministry. It’s typical for January – worship leaders have come off a stressful month and many are just plain in shock. Shock and stress alone are no reasons to leave a ministry. Over the years I’ve found two major indicators of when I should expect to see a change.
1. Restlessness. I have a cousin who was a pastor in a fairly well known, affluent historic church in a major city. Things were going great and he was happy as can be. But restless. He said he felt change was coming. His church was wonderful, but my cousin had taken it as far as he could and things had plateaued. Sure enough, a few months later he took the call to another church across the country where he’s been happily ministering.
Some people in ministry take the Apostle Paul approach – their gift is to help struggling ministries get healthy. then when the church has stabilized they move on to another struggling ministry.
Or maybe it’s as simple as a worship leader growing in his or her own faith, realizing there’s more to life than trying to politically please a stagnant leadership, and yearning for a church on fire where they can get busy for God.
2. Frustration. I had been working in one church for a few years and was as happy as a clam. A friend asked me “why are you still here at this church?” and I replied that I was having the time of my life and had no plans of leaving.
Two weeks later a new elder was elected who had an obvious vendetta against me (I would guess it stemmed from the fact I wouldn’t let his off-pitch wife sing on the praise team.) I suddenly went from doing everything right to being constantly “in trouble” – everything was wrong, from the songs to the style to the flow. I received another offer and was gone in 6 months (the same elder then proceeded to chase off the youth pastor and assistant pastor.)
There are two morals to this story. First of all, a message to the congregation: if things are going great in your church, keep an eye out for pesky elders and deacons who are looking for trouble where there is none. Many of them are unfortunately chosen because they are simply successful businessmen and not Spirit-led. Encourage and defend your staff because they are probably under constant attack and criticism to the point where they wonder “why bother.” That, may I add, is why churches are desperate to find good worship leaders – most have quit! I had three emails last week alone from churches looking to fill music positions.
Second of all, notice that I didn’t go out looking for something else – I was given an opportunity. When I’m called to a ministry I assume I’ll be there for the rest of my life. I typically do not make a move until God makes it for me or opens a door – I’ve only once looked for a church job. This is a major confirmation as to whether I should endure a situation (and try to improve it) or leave.
If I were ever to see this elder again, I’d thank him for running me off. As Joseph said in Genesis 50:20, “You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good.” Is that not the truth! If I hadn’t left that ministry I would never have gone to Seacoast Church, would never have met Chris Sligh, would never have driven him to all his American Idol auditions, would never have had the exciting, wild ride of a lifetime with the hoopla of Season 6 and would never have had the chance to work with legendary producer Brown Bannister who crafted Chris’s debut recording. Whenever my clock radio wakes me up to my string arrangement on one of Chris Sligh’s songs playing on the local Christian station I have to chuckle – I could never have planned anything this incredible on my own so I’m just fine with letting God handle it.
Bottom Line: Ministry frustrations? My advice is this: life is way too complicated to figure it out on your own – let God lead you. Jeremiah 29:11, Psalm 25:4-5.
6 Responses to “Time to Leave Your Church?”
January 15, 2013
RyanGreat advice! One key is that we stay content wherever we are, because the grass is rarely greener on the other side. I love the example of how in a frustrating position, you decided to wait it out; you didn’t seek other opportunities. “I assume I’ll be there for the rest of my life.” This is an attitude that the church can be built on. This was encouraging to me. Thanks for writing.
January 15, 2013
SteveI wish you knew how timely this post is. I have been praying about some of your points just this morning. . Your post is a very welcome read, thank you
Steve
January 15, 2013
RobertI too enjoyed your post.
I am torn if I should leave my Church and when is it time ? Should I leave just because it is hard and or wait for God to show me another opening?
January 16, 2013
FrankThanks for a great article. I too was forced out of a worship position I loved. Mine wasn’t an elder but a jealous pastor who was in fear of losing control. Frustrating & sad. The pastor was released a few months after he pushed me, the youth pastor, and the associate pastor out of a thriving church.
I’m still in the transition so hearing your story gives me hope! One thing that has happened in my transition is the partnership with a long time friend where we completed a Worship resource book called “The Worship Leader’s Toolkit”. We have been published and have hopes that the book will help worship leaders balance all we are called to do. I don’t think the book ever would have come together had I not been forced into this transition time. We don’t always get God’s timing and plans – but they are for our good and His glory!
Keep Looking Up!
Frank Jonez
fjonez@mac.com
http://www.worshipleadertoolkit.com
January 17, 2013
JimAn interesting article that confirms my calling. Several months ago, I thought the whole worship experience was lacking the necessary components to lead our congregation into the Throne Room of our Lord. We had 2 girls from our youth group and a newlywed young woman lifting their voices in praise. We lost one of the girls as she was in her senior year of high school and was also going to early college. She could not devote the time to rehearsals any longer. Our other young lady was having some difficulties with personal issues. If that was not enough, our newlywed was approaching the delivery time of her 1st child. All in all, it was a great time for them but difficult for the WT. Back to basics I thought…or maybe after 5 yrs. I should move on also. There are opportunities all around. Deep prayer time and listening for Gods’ voice in what I should do have helped tremendously. I continued with prayer and listening patiently for 6 months. Throughout that time, God continually showed me the calling right here, right now, and until I (God) show you different. It was my attitude that needed changing. Now I look forward to music selection, practice, and the Sunday service. To assist the pastor and I to be on the same page, I bought him an enhanced subscription to Worship Leader. We are looking forward to working together with traditional and contempory methods for the livlihood of our church. There is renewed JOY in serving exactly where God wants me to be. Make a joyful noise unto the Lord!
January 22, 2013
Anthony ParrottI was sorely disappointed by the content of this article. I’m not sure this was not the author’s intent, but the idea that restlessness and frustration are key indicators that God’s will is for us to seek change in our lives runs right along with the more subtle forms of the health and wealth gospel, i.e. that God wants us merely to be comfortable. However, it is in times of our restlessness and frustration that we are most prone to grow and become more Christlike. Imagine if Mary and Martha’s restlessness and frustration at Jesus had caused them to say, “Never mind, Jesus, don’t bother coming for our brother Lazarus.”
I would highly recommend the book “Liberating Ministry from the Success Syndrome” (Amazon: http://gnccne.ws/Wpqdor). It challenges our common notions of what ministry success is and what we should be looking for as we are called to be faithful to God’s will.